Reporting for Bizarro from Washington D.C. - Brad Schpiedelhacker
Bring it in people it’s the big one. The Soccer World Cup straight from the country of South Africa, home of Nelson Mandela. There’s gonna be a fandemonium out there! For those of you unfamiliar with soccer, here’s a quick look at our opponents.
Algeria: They’ll be playing on home turf here with the games taking place in Africa, so could pose a threat. This is their 3rd appearance at the big one, with their key player being Yazid Mansouri, aka The Wildman.
Slovenia: A European minnow we can only compare to the Memphis Grizzlies. If we can’t beat them we should just pack our bags and come home. I can’t say I’m completely aware of their geographical location, but I doubt they will last long in the African heat and not even their star player, Milivoje Novakovic (aka Prime Time) can save them from elimination.
England: Our main adversaries for the top classification spot. They’ve got the English equivalent of Wayne Gretzky in offence - Wayne Rooney, aka The Wonder Kid. Indomitable at the big house during the qualification period we have to take them very seriously. This is their 12th appearance at the big one, having won it once in 1966 at the big house, Wembley, London. England.
Holy cow I’m pumped. Bring it on sportsfans!
i can't believe the word "soccerball" was not used.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure there will be more reports from Brad, so it may still be used.
ReplyDelete